In Mumbai lives a guy Called Aviekal

Aviekal Kakkad is not into the kakdi business, nor does he sell avial (bad joke inspired by office humour). He is a dancer and a struggling actor who moved to Mumbai a few years ago from Delhi. He runs a dance academy here by the name of Ace Dance Academy. He has starred in a few TV serials and MTV Fully Faltu. He has choreographed a few ads and some music videos. In fact he's a good singer too. He has also been a state level swimming champion and at the same time can cook some really good food. He owns a flat in Kandivali today which is seldom not invaded by a huge circle of friends and he is living a pretty good life.

CHILDHOOD AND FIRST HEART BREAK

Aviekal was born in Kolkatta. He had an elder brother who would always get to do the chores that involved stepping out of the house while Aviekal would help his mother in tidying the house and cooking. Slowly he developed a liking towards these chores in the sense of it being a daily routine.

He used to play a few games but his interest always lied in dancing which led his mother to take him to a kathak teacher in the neighbourhood who refused to take him in as a student because he was a boy and all her students were girls. Disappointed, Aviekal decided not to give up. He made friends with the teacher's kids and got an easy access to the house and the dance classes. He learnt while watching and then one day he performed in the class. That's when the teacher realized what she had been missing in her students. She took him in. He was all of 3-4 years old at this time.

He started going to school and, because of his singing and dancing, became quite popular. Sports was limited to swimming and there was this guy in his class who mentioned once: 'Main Aviekal se shaadi karunga'.

"It became a joke among kids and we were always teased. His name was Danny and we were really good friends. We were kids then, we didn't know what we were saying", says Aviekal while talking about it. "Suddenly my dad got his transfer orders to Delhi and I had to leave Kolkatta, my dance class, my school and Danny." He adds: " I missed him but it was all forgotten in sometime".

Hey Danny, if you are reading this somewhere, how you doin?

ADOLESCENSE: DRIFTING FROM DELHI TO BHATINDA

Aviekal used to hate his Nani (his maternal grandmother). His Nani stayed in Delhi with the rest of the family and always picked on him: 'Kaala hai, bhaand hai, nautanki hai' etc. As a child this affected Aviekal very badly.

Anyway, he did manage to persuade his mother to take him to Birju Maharaj and he learnt kathak from him. He performed regularly in school but nobody from his family showed up, except his parents. Even his elder brother always teased him.

Till then academics wasn't Aviekal's cup of tea. But it led to such a huge showdown in the house one day that Aviekal quit dancing and decided to prove his mettle in academics.

And he did. He was among the top 3 rankers in school. Later his family shifted to Bhatinda, in Punjab, and he was happy that his Nani wouldn't be an everyday part of his life.

"I don't hate my Nani or the rest of my family today. It was too painful then, especially as a teenager. You hate everyone who says anything against your will".

"Anyway, we moved to Bhatinda and in 12th standard I fell in love. I had a crush on this girl. But she liked a friend of mine and I lost her to him. I have never felt like that about a girl again… thank God!"

Aviekal and his brother later came back to Delhi to pursue college.

THE YOUTH, THE REBEL AND THE ACCEPTENCE

His brother continued to be extremely displeased with him. Aviekal wanted to join dance classes but his family wanted him to do something worthwhile. So Aviekal did both. He went for his Hotel Management classes and enrolled at the Sri Ram Center for kathak as well. He added working at Pizza Hut, Connaught Place in his to-do list too.

He used to choreograph small dance sequences for the Pizza Hut staff. That's when Ashley Lobo (The Dance Works Academy man) spotted and approached him to join his classes and become a member with Dance Works.

"One night while going back to Noida from CP, a guy called Aseem gave me a lift. In between the conversation, he asked me if I was gay. Yes, I guess was my reply. And I suddenly felt so much lighter about myself. I felt I had found me. Aseem was a lawyer. He took my number and gave a few to me. He later invited me to come for a gay party and I agreed."

"The party was at the F Bar. I was shocked to see big names like Rohit Bal, Sylvie etc. I also saw some colleagues from Dance Works. I felt a part of this community, yet different. I was not there to pick up just about anyone. People were doing that. I got a culture shock," he adds.

The moment of realization didn't change Aviekal as a person but it did make him more confident.

NOW COMES FAMILY AND LOVE

Aviekal fell in love with a guy called Sidhharth. They met at a party and before they knew it, they were meeting everyday. Just after a month, Aviekal went through a sudden and complete memory loss. He could remember nothing beyond the first six years of his life. Sidhharth used to come everyday to meet him. His mother was suspicious but not sure. After a month, when Aviekal recovered, there were huge problems in his house regarding his career and way of life. Aviekal was sick of it and tried to commit suicide.

"I left a letter for my parents where I mentioned how everything had always been wrong with me and now take this - I'm a homosexual too".

His family and brother have now accepted him. Though his extended family remains in the dark.

"Things have changed today. People are more open and straightforward. I wouldn't try to commit suicide for something like this today."

Aviekal also got into a difference of opinion and ethics with 'The Dance Works' and a mass quitting happened. He started his own academy and he managed to do his own shows too. Everything was going great but Siddharth had problems. He was not ready to tell his family. Siddharth's family was asking him to get married and so Aviekal thought it best to leave everything behind him and pursue his dreams in the city that promises to fulfill them for all. Mumbai.

IN MUMBAI AND WISER

Aviekal was living in with another man for a while. But this fellow, too, turned out to be the same. He had difficulty accepting the fact that he was gay and went back to women.

Aviekal has put one more disappointment behind him now. He lives for his academy. He feels that maybe, after all his friends are married and settled, he would have problems. He would be left alone as in India gay marriages are illegal.

When it comes to opening up to his extended family he says:

"You are straight, do you go around calling all your family around the world and telling them that? It's the same for me. I'm gay, I don't have to tell anyone unless anyone wants to know."

And what about straight men always thinking gays will hit on them?

"Firstly, you can recognize who is and who isn't. Secondly we don't go around hitting on people all the time. There is more to our lives than sex, like in yours. And this image is thanks to certain gays, hell bent on making a fool of themselves. They want attention and fame. We all know them; I don't want to name them. Like everybody else, we are also looking to settle down. There is a certain age for flirting and fooling around. It's universal."

And about the portrayal of gays in movies:

"Again I don't know why some gays are doing such nonsense on screen. Don't generalize us like that. We are people who can take a bunch of jokes on ourselves. But recently there have been movies that are showing it as a casual reality which it is."

A straight celebrity who he wishes was gay?

"Celebrity and straight ??!!" he repeats, bursting out in laughter.

" Ok seriously, Richard Gere and Hrithik Roshan".

And what about Lesbians? Why aren't they coming out of the closet?

"It's not easy the way people just create a problem for the sake of one. Our society is so narrow-minded. Plus parents ki izzat and all. Women are better children to their parents." (sic)

Anything else?

"If you're gay just accept it for real. If you get married to a girl, you are going to commit a sin and it'll be more unfair to her than yourself. We like it otherwise, let's leave it at that. It's a feeling, and we are not harming anyone with it. So I request society to take care of bigger issues like people peeing on the road. That's just sick."

Here's hoping that Aviekal will find the right guy for himself and they'll finally be allowed to live 'gay'ly ever after.